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A couple of weeks ago the news came out that directory business Yellow Pages Group was being taken off the sales block.

The marketers of the business pointed to the current economic climate in justifying the decision to can the sales process, while others identified bank pressure as the key motivator. However at a digital level, I reckon the business has experienced killer jabs from consumers and Google that it has failed to recover from.

Back in March 2007 Yellow Pages Group was sold by Telecom to a joint private capital and pension consortium for $2.2 billion, in what was the largest ever local leveraged buyout. Even in the heady pre-global financial crisis times, it was a sobering amount of money.

Clearly the buyers were factoring in significant growth to justify the price, but this failed to eventuate. In the sales collateral circulated by the sales agent earlier this year reported annual revenue was quoted as being $297 million, while “pro forma” EBITDA was $166m.

Word on the streets was that the owners were seeking offers in the $600m to $900m range. The fact that this sum would only go about halfway to meeting the $1.7 billion owed to more than 20 banks and lenders, speaks volumes about the pressure the owners felt to sell.

The information memorandum circulated by the sales agents identified two main business segments, the directory business and the 018 assistance business, with the former making up the vast majority of income.

A directory business makes money in two core ways. First it seeks to upsell listers into larger listings with bells and whistles.

In the media game this is known as “lipstick” as it portrays the person or business in more glamorous light.

A second source of income is the display advertising it can bundle up with the actual listings, in the same way newspaper websites run advertisements around news copy.

While arguments can be made about whether or not Yellow Pages did a good job of selling lipstick and display, I would argue a core reason for its downfall in the online space is that it forgot about consumers.

It figured brand alone would result in it owning online directories, to the point of forgetting that one needs to earn the right to offer services to consumers.

Street wisdom is that a punter will suffer a poor user experience two or three times on a website before they simply give up and go somewhere else. This is what I figure happened to most users of Yellow Group’s two flagship websites.

If you have ever gone to http://www.yellow.co.nz or http://www.whitepages.co.nz then a few things become apparent.
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Firstly, the search engine is dreadful. There seems to be no fathomable rhyme or reason to the results you will get. Rather than using smart algorithms to work out what a person is likely to be looking for, they seem tightly targeted on verbatim search terms. So if you search for “David Smith, Christchurch”, it won’t return listings for D Smith.

The frustration experienced when you search for a person whom you know is there but stays hidden courtesy of a dumb search engine can push normally sane people right to the edge.

Secondly, the default search order for businesses is nominally based around those businesses it holds the most information about. Not only is this not intuitive for users, it looks suspiciously like advertising spend determines placement. Not a great way to build trust.

And thirdly, the search cards for businesses don’t actually list the phone numbers, you need to click off to another page. Damn frustrating.

A usability expert could have a field day on these webpages. Sadly it will be too late if many online consumers have already given up on the two directory sites.

Meanwhile Google got a lot better. And I mean a lot better. Not only did it launch Google Directory and Google Streetview, but its content indexing got a truckload better for phone numbers. It’s fast and mobile friendly. Plus it does a pretty mean reverse phone number search.

Then last year Google introduced multi packs of local business listings, based on geolocation.This is where it displays contact details for likely businesses along with a source map, after working out where you are. So if you search “pizza” and are in Christchurch, you get seven local pizzarias offered up. Last year searchengineland.com found that the organic referral visits of many big business directory sites’, including Yellow’s US equivalents http://www.yellowpages.com, http://www.whitepages.com and www. superpages.com, dropped in the wake of this change.

Yellow Group had a huge headstart with its online directory business, with trusted brands that went back generations. The business was its to lose and a combination of lousy usability and the Google monster may have seen that come to pass.

The sobering news is that the same thing could happen to your business. There are a swag of companies looking decidedly unsustainable in the face of Google’s profound ability to examine, index and retrieve information.

If you rely on ownership of data, obscurity of information or a tilted playing field, then Google will likely challenge your long-term sustainability. The weaknesses I perceive in Yellow Group’s flagship websites is a salient reminder to any business owner to ask how Google-proof they are.

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An old retired pilot mate of mine, Captain Bryan,  just sent me an extract from a 50 year olf flying manual for a radial engined plane (the AD-6).  I’m no aviator but its a fine evocative set of prose that makes you appreciate the jet aircraft of today.  Reproduced here for your pleasure.

Radial Starting

Be sure you drain both the sumps. (You can fill your Zippo lighter while you do this)

Look out the left side of the oily cockpit canopy and notice a very nervous person holding a huge fire bottle. Nod to this person.

1. Crack throttle about one-quarter of an inch.

2. Battery on

3. Mags on

4. Fuel boost on

5. Hit starter button (The four bladed 13’ 6’ prop will start a slow turn)

6. Begin to bounce your finger on top of the primer button.

a. This act requires finesse and style. It is much like a ballet performance. The engine must be seduced and caressed into starting.

7. Act one will begin: Belching, banging, rattling, backfiring, spluttering, flame and black smoke from the exhaust shooting out about three feet. (Fire bottle person is very pale and has the nozzle at the ready position)

8. When the engine begins to “catch” on the primer. Move the mixture to full rich. The flames from the exhaust will stop and white smoke will come out. (Fire bottle guy relaxes a bit) You will hear a wonderful throaty roar that is like music to the ears..

a. Enjoy the macho smell of engine oil, hydraulic fluid and pilot sweat.

9. Immediately check the oil pressure and hydraulic gages.

10. The entire aircraft is now shaking and shuttering from the torque of the engine and RPM of prop.

a. The engine is an 18 cylinder R-3350 that develops 2,700 HP.

11. Close cowl flaps to warm up the engine for taxi.

12.  Once you glance around at about 300 levers, gauges and gadgets, call the tower to taxi to the duty runway.

Take off in the AD-6

1. Check both magnetos

2. Exercise the prop pitch

3. Cowl flaps open.

4. Check oil temp and pressure.

5. Crank 1.5 degrees right rudder trim to help your right leg with the torque on takeoff.

6. Tell the tower you are ready for the duty runway.

7. Line the bird up and lock the tail wheel for sure.

8. Add power slowly because the plane (with the torque of the monster prop and engine power definitely wants to go left).

9. NEVER add full power suddenly! There is not enough rudder in the entire world to hold it straight.

10.Add more power and shove in right rudder till your leg begins to tremble.

11.Expect banging, belching and an occasional manly fart as you roar down the runway at full power.

12.Lift the tail and when it feels right pull back gently on the stick to get off the ground.

13.Gear up

14.Adjust the throttle for climb setting

15.Ease the prop back to climb RPM

16.Close cowl flaps and keep an eye on the cylinder head temp.

17.Adjust the power as needed as you climb higher or turn on the super charger.

Flying with the round engine.

1. Once your reach altitude which isn’t very high (about 8000 feet) you reduce the throttle and prop to cruise settings.

2. The next fun thing is to pull back the mixture control until the engine just about quits. Then ease it forward a bit and this is best mixture.

3. While cruising the engine sounds like it might blow or quit at any time. This keeps you occupied scanning engine gauges for the least hint of trouble.

4. Moving various levers around to coax a more consistent sound from the engine concentrates the mind wonderfully.

5. At night or over water a radial engine makes noises you have never heard before.

6. Looking out of the front of the cockpit the clouds are beautiful because they are slightly blurred from the oil on the cockpit canopy.

7. Seeing lightning in the clouds ahead increases the pucker factor by about 10.

a. You can’t fly high enough to get over them and if you try and get under the clouds—-you will die in turbulence.

b. You tie down everything in the cockpit that isn’t already secured, get a good grip on the stick, turn on the deicers, tighten and lock your shoulder straps and hang on.

c. You then have a ride to exceed any “terror” ride in any amusement park ever built. You discover the plane can actually fly sidewise while inverted.

8. Once through the weather, you call ATC and in a calm deep voice advise them that there is slight turbulence on your route.

9. You then scan you aircraft to see if all the major parts are still attached. This includes any popped rivets.

10. Do the controls still work? Are the gauges and levers still in proper  limits?

11.  These being done you fumble for the relief tube, because you desperately need it. (Be careful with your lower flight suit zipper)

The jet engine and aircraft

Start a jet

1. Fuel boost on.

2. Hit the start button

3. When the JPT starts to move ease the throttle forward.

4. The fire bottle person is standing at the back of the plane and has no idea what is going on.

5. The engine lights off—and—

6. That’s about it.

Take off in the jet

1. Lower flaps

2. Tell the tower you are ready for takeoff.

3. Roll on to the duty runway while adding 100% power.

4. Tricycle gear—no tail to drag—no torque to contend with.

5. At some exact airspeed you lift off the runway.

6. Gear up

7. Milk up the flaps and fly.

8. Leave the power at 100%


Flying the jet

1. Climb at 100%

2. Cruise at 100%

3. It is silent in the plane.

4. You can’t see clouds because you are so far above them.

5. You look down and see lightning in some clouds below and pity some poor fool that may have to fly through that mess.

6. The jet plane is air conditioned!! Round engines are definitely not. If you fly in tropical areas, this cannot be stressed enough.

7. There is not much to do in a jet, so you eat your flight lunch at your leisure.

8. Few gauges to look at and no levers to adjust. This leaves you doodling on your knee board.

9. Some call girl friends on their cell phones: “Guess where I am etc”

Some observed differences in round engines and jets

1. To be a real pilot you have to fly a tail dragger for an absolute minimum of 500 hours.

2. Large round engines smell of gasoline (115/145), rich oil, hydraulic fluid, man sweat and are not air-conditioned.

3. Engine failure to the jet pilot means something is wrong with his air conditioner.

4. When you take off in a jet there is no noise in the cockpit. (This does  not create a macho feeling of doing something manly)

5. Landing a jet just requires a certain airspeed and altitude—at which you cut the power and drop like a rock to the runway. Landing a round engine tail dragger requires finesse, prayer, body English, pumping of rudder pedals and a lot of nerve.

6. After landing, a jet just goes straight down the runway.

7. A radial tail dragger is like a wild mustang—it might decide to go anywhere. Gusting winds help this behavior a lot.

8. You cannot fill your Zippo lighter with jet fuel.

9. Starting a jet is like turning on a light switch—a little click and it is on.

10. Starting a round engine is an artistic endeavor requiring prayer (holy curse words) and sometimes meditation.

11. Jet engines don’t break, spill oil or catch on fire very often which leads to boredom and complacency.

12. The round engine may blow an oil seal ring, burst into flame, splutter for no apparent reason or just quit. This results in heightened pilot awareness at all times.

13. Jets smell like a kerosene lantern at a scout camp out.

14.  Round engines smell like God intended engines to smell and the tail dragger is  the way God intended for man to fly

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I love small towns.  And I love the service that you get from service providers in small towns, where personalised rather than commoditised service is still the norm.  Well, Normally.

On Saturday 13 February I took my recently restored 1275GT Mini for a drive up in the beautiful Horowhenua and noticed my front left tyre was loose.

Being close to Firestone in Levin I dropped in to see if they could give it a tighten.  I’ve been doing business there for about the last year, tyres for the boat trailer, wheer bearings, alignment for the racecar and a few odds and ends.

They kindly agreed to do it on the spot and a bloke with a ratchet handle the size of cricket bat proceeded to tighten it, and tighten it he did right up until the wheel stud snapped clean off.  So that left three nuts holding the wheel on and one snapped on the shaft.

He suggested I go to Super Cheap and find a new wheel stud.  Note he didn’t take ownership of the problem he created.  It was my problem.  What the hell I thought, its a nice day I’ll go check out Super Cheap.  Nothing.  Repco.  Nothing.

So I came back to Firestone and asked for the Manager.  The Manager said no problem, we’ll take care of it.  I’ll find a stud and give you a call when it comes in.  Great!  Just the words I wanted to hear.  So I took the Mini home.  And waited.  And waited.  And waited.

Three weeks later I dropped in on 5 March.  “oh yeah, I was going to ring you.  We are having a local firm make up a wheel stud.  I’ll get on to them and give you a call” Great stuff!

So I waited and waited and waited. Nothing.

22 March I drop in again. “oh yeah, meant to call you.  These local guys can’t make up so I will have to find one somewhere”.  At this stage my patience is running out a bit.  I give him the details for Swift Automotive who stock the wheel studs and he agrees to call them and then to call me.  Yeah right.

Its now been almost 6 weeks since the Firestone technician broke my wheelstud and still it hasn’t been fixed.  And I yet to have had a single call or proactive contact from the business.

Come on Firestone.  This is your brand.  I am a customer.  Don’t fix this because you have to under the Consumer Guarantees Act.  Fix it because you broke it and you will put right what you break.  And fix it because I’d like to continue to be your customer.

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As I wrote this month’s MOD’s Motors about Bucket Lists I couldn’t help but think of my own journey through the various driving experiences I’ve had over the last 42 years.  While this smells a little like that scene in High Fidelity where John Cusack orders his record collection auto-biographically, here’s my best attempt at summarising cars and bikes I’ve owned over my 42 years.

Cars: Mini Clubman K 1100, Mini Round Nose 1ooo (Twin SUs), Escort Sport 1600 (RS1800 inside), MGB Roadster, Ford Capri Mk2 2ooo, Dodge Ramcharger Stretch Van (lived in it for a year in the States), Mitsubishi L200 4×4 double cab, Mazda MX5, Nissan Patrol y60 4.2, Lancia Beta Supercharged, Landrover Series 3 SWB, Subaru WRX STI, Fiat 124 CC, Lotus 7, Bertone x1/9, BMW 325 Motorsport, Toyota Landcruiser VX100,  Nissan Patrol Y61, BMW M3 e36, Mazda RX8S, Volkswagen Kombi Kamper Bay Window, BMW/Hamann M3, Mini Clubman 1275GT, VW/Manx Beach Buggy.

Bikes: Honda Z50, Honda XL125, Yamaha IT175, Yamaha TT500.  Serious accident.  Out of bikes for 7 years.  Honda XL500R, Yamaha Tenere 600, Suzuki GSX750ESG, Suzuki GSX1100F, WR250, Triumph Daytona 900, Kawasaki KLX650, Honda XR650, Triumph Daytona 955, Ducati 907ie, Yamaha TT600, Cagiva 900 Elefant, Ducati 916, BMW 1100GS, Beta Techno, BMW 1150GS, Norton Combat Commando, GasGas TXT 250, Suzuki PE250T, KTM 950, KTM 990, MotoGuzzi Stone 1100, Beta Rev3, Yamaha TT500.

When I stand back and try to put all of this in some kind of perspective, it’s damn hard.  A couple were weeping sores of ownership blues – the MGB Roadster and Lancia Beta certainly come to mind in this regard.  Some were magnificent when they were going – see here the Norton Commando and the Fiat 124.  A couple were minter one-owner examples that I was a mug to ever sell – the Series 3 Landrover certainly was.  One was absolute death on wheels – the GSX 1100F with a 16 inch front wheel and plasticene frame – not great when you’ve got 140 horsepower going on.

But the rest I have remarkably positive memories from.  They delivered light and laughter and enabled some fabulous road trips with friends and strangers – and some strangers that became friends.  The weird thing when I look at it in this perspective is that I seem to be trying to recapturing my youth.

I’m currently in the final stages of restoring a 1980 TT500 – the same thing that damn near killed me when I was 17.  And one of the last cars I bought was a old school Mini Clubman which will boil to the top of the resto list when I finish the big TT.  So maybe its middle age crisis – still, a lot safer than taking a mistress or turning to the booze.

But when it comes to picking favourites it’s damn near impossible.  When Edward Weston was asked what his favourite photograph was, he always said the one he would take tomorrow.  When I ask Dave Wallace what his favourite ride is, he reckons it’s the one he’s currently planning.

Perhaps the same is true of vehicles.  I’m not sure.  Tell me what you think, and your favourite ride.

Stay upright and try not to kick the bucket

MOD

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Two weeks ago the Government announced its proposed increases for motor vehicle levies and we are now in the middle of a four week consultant period, before proposals are finalised.  The proposals hit all kiwi motorists in the pocket, from family station wagons, to moped riders and courier vans.

But the hardest hit are the 55,000 kiwis who ride motorcycles over 600ccs.  They will see their annual levy go up from $252 to $745, basically a 300% rise.

What will happen as a result?  Well let’s consider.

Firstly it’s likely that the value of cheaper 600cc+ bikes will fall through the floor.  Not much point in spending $3000 on a bike, only to pay out its entire value over the first 4 years of ownership.  For all the people that own these sorts of bike, it’s effectively corroding the value of their assets.  Meanwhile if you own multiple bikes, you’ll be well motivated to sell them.  Again, the laws of supply and demand would suggest the prices of used bikes are likely to fall, and the new/used margin increase.

Second, the many businesses that exist around selling and servicing these bikes will face a serious downturn in business.  Some will go under.

Third, its likely to force more people onto smaller bikes, particularly 50cc mopeds and sub 125cc motorcycles, which are the least affected by the proposed changes.  My personal experience is that the smaller bikes are a lot more dangerous, and mopeds in particular are dangerous because anyone with a car licence can ride them.  Their smaller wheels are less stable, their brakes and handling are seldom as good as full size bikes and their extreme light weight makes them a liability in the wind.

Fourth, our carbon footprint is likely to increase as is traffic congestion, as motorcyclists move more towards cars.  My bike does 5 litres/100km and takes up about 1.5 cubic metres, roughly twice as economical and less than half as big as typical car.  On top of this older, bigger bikes will become more of a commodity item, whereby people will be more inclined to simply ride them into the ground and then dump them rather than renew the rego.  Clearly then, this is not a flash move for the environment.

Lastly, the proposed changes I believe will see a lot of people with no motorcycle experience being taxed into moped ownership.  My expectation is that moped and small motorcycle accidents will skyrocket.

The Ministry of Transport’s ‘Motor Vehicle Crashes in New Zealand 2008’ shows that injuries to motorcyclists and pillions in 2008 are at same level as 1957 (1397 vs 1396), but the number of car drivers injured has almost trebled (2964 vs 8536). So to hit out at Motorcyclists at this time simply seems unfair.

A recent New Zealand Herald editorial noted that the Government, keen to impose cost controls, has sought to portray the compensation scheme as being on the point of collapse. The article also noted a ballooning of costs and, now, as a consequence, the need for fairly strong medicine, with the inference that the current proposals reflect that.

There are a variety of other options available to Government to deliver the revenue they are seeking.  These range from experience rates and lower levels for those with safe records, to increasing the fuel tax component, through to relating it to accident causation rather than involvement.  Or how about basing it on the licensed rider than each individual bike – it is kinda hard to ride two bikes at the same time.

There is also great opportunity here for the equivalent of a no claims bonus.  Why should a person with an unblemished record subsidise some idiot who is a persistent pranger?

As idealistic as this sounds, New Zealand is blessed with an open form of Government.  If you feel strongly about this issue, then you should actively get involved while the consultation period is still open.  That gives you just two weeks to act.  So don’t bitch about this after the door is closed.  Time to pull finger

So What can I do?


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